Feel it, write it.

This is the very beginning of my newsletter FEELING PIECES. I hope you still remember me. We met in one of my virtual FieldTrips for Creative Mornings when I introduced to you the therapeutical effect of writing. It took me a little while to start with this newsletter, so now I am happy to share my FEELING PIECES with you.

What are FEELING PIECES?

FEELING PIECES are those connections we make with ourself and with other people when we listen to their stories, when we reflect them. When their stories resonate with us and they stimulate emotions and thoughts – we get inspired. Here I share those stories of meaningful conversations that I had, conversations that changed my perspective. And I would also love to hear your stories, please write me!

Each issue of this newsletter is dedicated to a specific topic and I will provide you both one of my stories and some writing exercises to invite you to reflect, to discover your feelings, to heal or to just spend some time with yourself.

This month FEELING PIECES deals with pride and in this newsletter you will find:

No regrets: A chance encounter with my pride

Feel it, write it: What is pride?

No regrets

A chance encounter with my pride

His son had once moved to Berlin for some time, he told me, when he heard that I lived there and was just visiting here in London. His son once worked there as an art director in an advertising agency. But now he lives in London again, because of the pandemic he couldn’t keep his job and went back.

Without worry or regret, but full of pride and respect, he told me about his son’s career. For he supported his son in all his plans, regardless of what he himself thought of them, because he should eventually have it good in life and be happy as a proud gay man. That’s what really matters to him.

Actually, that evening, after a long day at work, I was too lazy to walk back to the hotel. So I ended up in the back seat of Andrew’s Uber and found myself in this conversation about family, home and being different. Andrew told me about his childhood in South Africa, his parents‘ supermarket back then, his wife, who is a fashion designer, and his children, whom he always supported in taking advantage of all the opportunities in life and trying things out:

„I don’t like people regretting what they could have done in their lives.“

I listened spellbound and rejoiced at every red light, every detour, and even when Andrew got lost, because it extended that moment with him, too. A tear rolled down my face when I finally got out of his car. For I felt how different, how much more serene my life could have been with a father like Andrew. But instead of envy, I was overcome by a feeling of security, of warmth, of confidence with myself, of gratitude for this encounter in this car late that evening.

That night I fell asleep with pride – for my love that matters, for living a life without shame for who I am, for the family and home my husband and me created and for the community we formed around us.

Feel it, write it.

One again, we see so many logos draped in rainbow flags, the pictures of happy people with put-on smiles in colorful campaigns – yes, it’s Pride Month. We’re celebrating the colorful life, the otherness. But if you believe the campaign motifs, pride is all about parties and happiness. Please, don’t fall for this commercial rainbow washing.

What is your pride?

To feel pride, we need the ability of self-awareness. Pride as a feeling is tied to the fact that we evaluate. We measure ourselves by whether we achieve a certain goal or can do something that others can or cannot do. As “misfits” for a long time we tried to conform with societal standards. So, for me pride – not only in June – is all about building community, about raising awareness for otherness and diversity, about respecting each other, about fighting for equal rights and about creating safe and inclusive spaces.

Now it’s your turn to write

The writing prompts are all about your understanding of pride. I advise you to proceed step by step. Read one question and answer it. Then move on to the next question. Enjoy your process!

On my website you can find the FEELING PIECES Manifesto for therapeutic writing with some guidance for your writing process.

Who is proud of you and why?

What are you proud of about yourself?

What does pride mean for you?

I hope you like the first issue of my newsletter. Feel free to contact me and send me your feedback and ideas. And I’d be very happy if you spread the word and share this newsletter with your friens and surroundings.

Yours,

Ralf

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